Can't Believe It

This has been a decision I've been back and forth on for the whole week. Even within a day, I said I'm going then a few hours later - I don't think I'm going. Even yesterday, while having lunch with a friend I said, "I'm not going." A few seconds later, I bursted into tears. After that reaction, I thought for sure I was packing my bags for Berlin.

But here I am, on decision making day, and I'm not going. The e-mail has been sent declining the position. You may think I'm crazy to decline this once in a lifetime job offer and maybe you are right. But they say, we make our opportunities so I know this is not the last chance. I know I'm not settling, for heaven's sake, I made the most risky decision by staying.

If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine. It's lethal.

I truly believe that if there was more time to prepare, say I would leave in March, I would have gone. But having one month to rush around just stressed me out.

So this was just a small bump in the road, a little excitement. I am sticking with the original plan. I am moving home, subbing, saving money, and we will see about a trip. I am truly looking forward to visiting with friends that I once saw weekly and now see bi-monthly -if that. I'm just going to make the best of this situation.